Get Some Life Balance. Key Number 3: Motivation

"What Are My Motivators?"

As a health coach and fitness trainer, I've heard many motivating factors from people when it comes to wanting to get in shape. Some examples include:

• “I would love to have arms like Madonna. Can you believe she’s in her sixties?”
• “This probably isn’t possible, but can you get my butt to look like J Lo’s? My husband has a thing for her.”
• “My college reunion is in a few months, and I need to turn back the clock.”

With time, I learned that what moves people to consider changing some lifestyle habits, at least initially, are external motivators. When I ask them, “What benefits do you expect to enjoy when you achieve this goal?”, it’s like peeling the layers of an onion. We start at the surface, and then we move toward the core where the motivators shift from external to internal. It’s the internal motivators that are going to keep you on the path toward your best self, even when change is challenging.

Harry, an attorney in his late sixties, wanted to lose about fifteen pounds and drop a few pant sizes. I posed the magic question, “What benefits do you expect to enjoy by losing this weight?”. “I’ll fit into those suits I haven't been able to wear for a few years.” I then ask him what else will happen. “Well, I’m sure it will be easier getting from the courthouse to the parking structure, which is five-blocks uphill.” “That’s a great reason”, I say; “Tell me more.” He thought for a few moments. “I get tired pretty quickly when I play with my grandson, and I’d like that to change.”

I asked Harry to tell me how he felt, in detail, when he spent time playing with his grandson. His smile spoke volumes, and he had no trouble describing the love he had for this boy and the joy their time together brought him. It was then that Harry admitted that he wasn’t feeling very thrilled about changing some lifestyle habits that he’d grown accustomed to, but after talking about his grandson, his perspective was much brighter.

It was when we connected the dots from the external motivator of fitting more easily into suits, to the internal motivator of adding more joy and fun to Harry’s life, that adopting healthier lifestyle behaviors went from being very unappealing to becoming a labor of love.

The takeaway: if there's a goal you're setting for yourself, then capture your heart's motivators by asking, "What benefits do I expect to enjoy, and how will it benefit the important people in my life?". The answers you come up with can increase your level of commitment dramatically as well as provide a valuable opportunity for growth and self-appreciation.

Be on the lookout for Key Number 4: "Your Strengths"