In conversation with Kym Allen

For this installment of “In conversation with…”, I sat down with my tribe member, Kym Allen, a master fitness trainer and instructor, and my friend of nearly 25 years. Kym played a pivotal role in my career development and as her colleague, I got to observe her passion and dedication for positively impacting people’s lives. She’s an example of how a career in the fitness industry can bring continued happiness and life satisfaction.

We’re all faced with challenges, but Kym and her husband, John, were dealt the most devastating blow that parents can face. Through tragedy, they learned who they could count on for support, ultimately experiencing recovery and healing through the love of their tribe.

In our interview, Kym talks about the benefits that come with vulnerability, the strength and determination she got from her parents and now instills in her children, the responsibilities that come with being a fitness professional, and what separates her from the sea of personal trainers in Los Angeles.

Well Street: Your Youtropolis miracle would be to give everyone the full understanding of true, unconditional love. How has receiving this type of love impacted you?

Exphysgrl: I think it’s given me confidence. It’s made me stronger and it’s made me confident to go out and try things and that no matter what happens I’m still loved and accepted by my family. Having that feeling can make you invincible. I think a lot of kids today lack that feeling of unconditional love and connection, and something I’ve instilled in my boys is that no matter what, they’re loved. I think a solid backbone you can give to someone is that they’re loved and accepted as they are.

Well Street: How are you currently spreading this love?

Exphysgrl: Professionally, my clients know I never judge them based on what they can do that day. Some days are a 3, and if you can make it the best 3 that you can, that’s great. I want my clients to know they’re loved and supported and that helps them feel more open and willing to be vulnerable. I’m able to uplift them and help them grow with those vulnerabilities and they feel completely safe with that.

Well Street: What sparked your interest in exercise physiology, and what enticed you to pursue a career as a fitness trainer?

Exphysgrl: With my undergraduate degree, I could have been a PE instructor but I wanted to do more with the science. Learning how the body works, both in its day-to-day and pushing it to its extremes was fascinating to me. Someone like Michael Phelps has a whole team to keep him in top shape but the average person doesn’t have that. Taking on a role where I could help those people achieve more and understand more about how their bodies work felt important to me. I’m happy my clients enjoy getting educated by me more than just being told to lift a barbell.

Well Street: In Los Angeles, there’s no shortage of fitness trainers. What makes you unique and separates you from the thousands in this city?

Exphysgrl: A client had referred an acquaintance to me. We spoke for a while and when they asked what I charged they said they could hire a trainer for $40 per hour. I told them, “That’s true, and if you get hurt, call me and I can help you.” There are important responsibilities that come with my job and being a caring and competent trainer is necessary to earn a person’s trust and have them feel safe. My background in physiology and higher education set me apart from others and my clients know they’re in good hands.

Well Street: Your heroes are RGB and Greta Thunberg. In what ways have their actions and pursuits inspired and influenced your own?

Exphysgrl: They didn’t back down on what they believed in and stuck to their guns.
A woman couldn’t get her own credit card when RGB was working her way up. She really stuck with herself and fought against the “you’re just a girl” mentality of that era.
Greta was 14 when she began her crusade, she’s never backed down, never been scared to tell politicians and corporations that their policies are failing the planet. I really admire that. Finding your calling and knowing what you’re driven to do is how I’ve felt. I know my pursuit of improving my clients’ lives is what I love and what brings me fulfillment, and just like my heroes, this is what I’m trying to continue doing—making a difference in ways I know I can.

Well Street: In your profile, you say that what liberates you is being mentally and physically strong. How much of your fortitude do you think you were born with and how much was developed? Who were some key players in that development?

Exphysgrl: My parents have always been my biggest cheerleaders and I’ve always felt loved and supported by them. I’ve always felt that whatever I tried, even if I failed and came back with my tail between my legs, they would always be there for me. Trying something and failing at it wasn’t a bad thing or looked down upon and I wasn’t shamed for it. My father was a wonderful example to witness. My brother and I once ran a marathon together and we talked about how, because of our dad’s influence, we’d likely have crawled to the finish line if we had to. When I set out to get something done, I’m going to do all I can to make that happen. My strength is definitely a blend of nature and nurture, but I think my parent’s compassion and love was my strongest influence.

Well Street: It’s said that good things come out of tragedy. What positives can you point to that came after the passing of your son, Scot?

Exphysgrl: I would say knowing who has your back. There are a lot of people who are there for the parties and fun, but when tragedy hits you quickly find out who will show up for you. People are uncomfortable facing certain things and their own issues will push them away from that discomfort. They’ll wind up fading away and you learn who’s going to stick with you when things aren’t fun.

Well Street: You’ve been with John for 32 years. What’s present in your relationship that unsuccessful ones might lack?

Exphysgrl: Knowing we’re both going to make mistakes and have bad days, not holding that against each other, and extending grace and patience are very important. Everybody fights and there have been days I’ve wanted to pack up his stuff and throw him to the curb but our pros outweigh the cons. I’ve always known we’re better together, and even on those days I don’t like him, I still love him. I know there are days he feels the same but it goes back to extending and receiving grace and acceptance of each other fully.

Well Street: How do you make others’ lives better?

Exphysgrl: As trainers, we can be a bit like therapists when clients want to open up to us and reveal how they’re really feeling that day. Because we aren’t part of their social circle, they may feel a type of permission to be vulnerable with us in ways they wouldn’t with others. Not only am I helping them physically and providing accountability, but I’m able to meet them where they are and provide an emotionally supportive workout that will leave them feeling cared for and appreciated.
Plus, I’m a good wife, mom, and daughter.