It's all about how we respond!
Monica is my cousin who was recently hospitalized with a number of serious and simultaneous conditions—gall stones, sepsis, and pneumonia. While in the hospital, her oxygen levels dropped dangerously low on two separate occasions, and her doctors struggled to get them back to normal. There was doubt about her chances to make it through. To everyone’s relief, Monica survived, and she’s at home resting as her respiratory system heals.
I called her and asked her about her experience. “There were a couple of times where I thought I was going to die. It was scary as hell,” she said. I wanted to know if, after having this health scare, she had any new perspectives on life. In true Monica fashion, she replied, “Don’t sweat the small stuff, it all belongs in the ‘F**k It Bucket’. Just live in the moment and enjoy every single one of them. Sh*t happens, it’s all about how we respond to the sh*t. I refuse to not enjoy what time I have left.” A blunt, but powerful message that can benefit us all.
It wasn’t long after our call that I had an opportunity to implement Monica’s advice about not sweating the small stuff. I had some plumbing work done in my bath tub that then required some new tiling. The tile guy came, and as is often the case, he didn’t have the right materials and was going to have to order them. It’s been three weeks, the job hasn’t been completed, the tile guy’s response to my outreach has been spotty, and a big piece of ugly plastic still covers a hole in the wall.
My conversation with Monica has stuck with me, and I’ve been able to view this situation as the small stuff that it really is. After all, this plastic covered hole doesn't prevent me from using the tub, and it’s unlikely that it will be among the things I think about when I’m on my death bed. By following my cousin’s advice, I’ve avoided feeling some frustration and stress. Don’t get me wrong, I’m annoyed by having had this eyesore in my bathroom for weeks now, but I’m not empowering it to stir up crummy and unwanted emotions.
These days, living in a state of hyper-alertness and vigilance is the new normal, and it's no wonder that we feel reactionary and impacted by life's inconveniences, annoyances, and mishaps. Is there a remedy? I believe that, at least in part, it’s Monica’s prescription of living in the moment, enjoying those moments, and having an enlightened perspective on what life brings.
What elements might you add to the prescription?
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Evangel
Facing big stuff diminishes the little stuff. I try to keep that in mind whenever an annoyance comes up. I also try to give the offender the benefit of the doubt, like he or she may have big issues they're trying to deal with--so why add to their misery by being angry at them?
I think you hit the nail on the head. We could each ask ourselves in the moment of distress over little things: Am I going to think about this on my deathbed?" If the answer is no, take a breath, give it time, or just let it go until it works itself out.