It's easy to hear words differently from what the person has intended. Words and tone can mean one thing to the deliverer and something totally different to the receiver. I know I've thought a person meant one thing, but when I take time to re-think and ask them, that's not what they meant at all. Taking time before you act is definitely the right call. Thanks for the reminder!
This is something very important to do. Something very disturbing happened to me recently and it was from a family member. She became a "Karen" and texted something that was hurtful and scolding, directed at me. Had she stopped and given herself time to calm down (from something completely benign), there would not have been any hurt feelings. Now it's too late. I don't see her in a very nice way. She showed her true colors. And they're a shad I don't like.
This is excellent advice. Highly sensitive people will often hear neutral words or tone as criticism and overreact when no judgment was ever intended. Sometimes, they'll say nothing and stew over it. Talking out hurt feelings, if they arise, is the right thing to do to give the imagined "critic" the benefit of the doubt.
Agreed! When managing a personal training department, I received "salty" emails from other departments, employees, and gym members almost daily. I'd find myself typing an equally stern response, then realize I needed to lower my temperature by pausing, taking some deep breaths, and addressing the issue with a clearer and calmer head.
Slipstream
It's easy to hear words differently from what the person has intended. Words and tone can mean one thing to the deliverer and something totally different to the receiver. I know I've thought a person meant one thing, but when I take time to re-think and ask them, that's not what they meant at all. Taking time before you act is definitely the right call. Thanks for the reminder!
Sanatana
This is something very important to do. Something very disturbing happened to me recently and it was from a family member. She became a "Karen" and texted something that was hurtful and scolding, directed at me. Had she stopped and given herself time to calm down (from something completely benign), there would not have been any hurt feelings. Now it's too late. I don't see her in a very nice way. She showed her true colors. And they're a shad I don't like.
Evangel
This is excellent advice. Highly sensitive people will often hear neutral words or tone as criticism and overreact when no judgment was ever intended. Sometimes, they'll say nothing and stew over it. Talking out hurt feelings, if they arise, is the right thing to do to give the imagined "critic" the benefit of the doubt.
Sanatana
I tried addressing the hurt feelings, but the perpetrator of reactivity became combative and defensive. No use talking to her, unfortunately.
Well Street
Agreed! When managing a personal training department, I received "salty" emails from other departments, employees, and gym members almost daily. I'd find myself typing an equally stern response, then realize I needed to lower my temperature by pausing, taking some deep breaths, and addressing the issue with a clearer and calmer head.
Sanatana
And how did that end up working out for you?
Well Street
I never regretted taking a few moments to breathe and edit my emails. I'm sure that spared me from getting reprimanded by my boss.