5 Questions To Ask Yourself Before The Day Ends

If you're like most people, you strive to be your best self. The motivation to go the "extra mile" may come from a desire to exceed others, live up to learned values, or simply feel satisfaction and pride.

"Best" can mean different things to different people. Maybe your best comes in the form of pleasing your family by finding time and resources to meet everyone's needs. For others, it may mean outperforming others at work, or on the golf course. Others may be obsessed with besting themselves through self-improvements goals such a lifting a heavier set of weights, making a perfect soufflé, or becoming fluent in Mandarin. But all these efforts add up to doing your best, not being your best.

Perhaps the most logical way to understand the difference between doing and being your best is by keeping in mind that doing your best takes planning, whereas being your best does not.

For example, if you hope to host the best party ever, you need to make a plan and execute it. But being your best means being mindful during that party so you don't end up gossiping with friends, getting pulled into a disagreement, or focusing on how people didn't follow attire guidelines.

Being your best comes from a desire to be right with yourself and fall asleep with a clean conscience. Deep down, this also feels nurturing and refreshing to your mind/body connections. And, on a soul level, it invites good karma and, perhaps, even a standing ovation when you meet your maker.

So how can you turn being your best into an easy, ongoing practice? You can start by asking yourself these five important questions every evening before your day ends:

1. Could I have listened more to others?

To answer this question, reflect on any conversations you had throughout your day. Ask yourself if you were dismissive, in a rush, disinterested, or more eager to talk about yourself. If so, contemplate how you can improve in this area of communication. 

It helps to remember that being your best self largely centers on mastering the art of keeping your heart fully open, especially when listening to others who may depend on you, or who do their best to support you.

2. Could I have managed any situation more effectively?

Life is overwhelming sometimes, so it's common to experience a rough spot or two during your day. If being your best fails you during such an event and leaves you ruminating over it during the night, forgive yourself, and remember no one is perfect. 

Then, take a moment to consider how you might have handled the situation differently had you been steeped in the mindset of your best self. If given the opportunity, you'll also want to offer an apology as soon as possible.

3. Did I give anyone the benefit of the doubt?

There's little doubt that it's harder than ever to separate truth from fiction today. But, when in doubt, your best self will give others the benefit of the doubt. 

Your best self is not interested in beating down others with your own opinion, nor is it interested in arguing over differing views. Your best self operates from the heart, not the mind. Giving someone the benefit of the doubt when you can't prove them wrong will always win the day.

4. Was I helpful to anyone?

In today's broken world, we all need a helping hand. Perhaps it's just a smile that lets someone know they've been seen, or maybe it's a kind word to assure them they've been heard. Your best self can be helpful in countless ways because it operates from the heart.

When you step up to help someone else, you also help yourself and feel good for your efforts. Every day, think of one way you can help one person, then take the action. On Youtropolis, uplifting someone is easy. Send a free postcard, award kindreds, or send a heartfelt private message.

5. Did I ask for someone's help?

Do you pride yourself on being fully self-sufficient? If so, asking for help is likely not your thing. But what if your perceived independence interferes with being your best self? What if others feel pushed away by your disinterest in their advice, emotional support, or loving-kindness? 

Your best self actually thrives when you allow others in. Asking for support of any kind is an affirmation of love, not just toward yourself, but toward the person who offers help. It lets them know how much you value them, and gives them the opportunity to feel good about themselves at the end of the day.

If you don't have time to contemplate all five questions at the end of every day, pick just one—your innate, best self will gravitate to the right one. Do this every day, and soon you'll sense the fragrance of your best self permeating everything you do and say.