The Messy Middle

Can you think of a time in your life where you found yourself in the gap between something ending and something beginning? There is actually a name for this gap...it's called a liminal space. This is a curious transitional time because you know you are on the precipice of something new but you aren't quite there yet. It's an experience of being called to release what you thought you knew at the same time you are letting go of your desire to control what is to come. This creates vulnerability. Neuroscience tells us our minds like things to be regular and consistent and it craves and creates predictability. A liminal space is anything but!

Research tells us liminal spaces can be short or longer and can be physical, mental, emotional or metaphorical...but eventually have an endpoint. Arriving on our designated floor after walking up a flight of stairs is an example of a short physical liminal space.

When it seems there is no end to the liminal space it can be an incredibly scary, uncomfortable and uncertain time. As I listen to many people talk about the covid pandemic, their concerns of rising costs, the election outcome and world affairs...I know they are experiencing a liminal space.

During these longer transitions, people often become afraid they won't have the resources to cope with what is being asked of them. For some people this time of transition can be destabilizing especially when there is a history of trauma. Talking to a therapist when your functioning is impacted can be helpful.

While the reality is we'll all find ourselves in that messy middle space from time to time a liminal space is undeniably challenging for the mind/body/spirit to manage. To become more than your fear and turn these liminal spaces into growth opportunities use these tips:

Keep your heart open and your circle of friends close so you don't feel alone.
Use breathing, meditation, yoga, prayer, journaling (what is this experience teaching me about myself) and body work to stay grounded.
Slow down. Try new things. Take small steps because you are walking in the dark.
Give yourself permission to make a lot of mistakes as you are reorienting.